Exploring Five Things Men Must Do

I thank the.strenuous.briefness for taking the time to respond to my open question regarding what feminist men should teach other men about feminism even though I “shouldn’t expect [women] to want or be ready to discuss where [men] fit in or what role [they] should take” I applaud her work because it moves beyond the call for and joy for by feminists for men to join their movement and offers practical facts and warnings for men as they head on that endeavor. She lists five things that men should do which I explore below:

Teach men humility:
This recommendation points to the difficulty that the men will have as he becomes a feminist and points to what I have encounter as a feminist. Yes, feminists are happy when men join their movement but one cannot see this as a congratulatory sign. All people should be feminists and work towards the end of feminism. We must listen to feminists that came before us, reflect on their work, and only then can we add to the feminist discourse.

Teach men that they have unearned privilege:
This recommendation will also be difficult for men to internalize. Yes, racist, gay, female jokes are bad and unfortunately are also a big part of male culture. Male culture needs to change and one’s masculinity should not be questioned if a man rejects a part of male culture. When men question why they should be part of the feminist movement and all the things they claim they will lose illustrate for them what they will gain with the ending of gender binaries and all that they will be able to do when they are not constrained by their masculinity.

Teach men to account for their unearned privilege:
Men need to be careful when teaching/learning about women’s studies as it is impossible to check our male privilege at the door. We need to listen more then we speak. We can’t expect to have women council us through our emotions and we cannot assume we know the oppression of women just because we are also oppressed in some way in our lives. For the most part, we are on this journey only with other men and we need to counsel ourselves and take advice from each other on how to adopt to this feminist world view.

Teach men they are not the first, nor the only:
Yes, there are other male feminists that are out their. We need to not only read and discuss their work but we need to become unified to learn about how the feminist struggle will affect us as men and find concrete ways to incorporate feminism into both our own lives and into masculinity. When we do this we need to make sure men of color are included in this conversation as they have important insights to share.

Teach men to work with us, not for us:
All of humanity is in this together and we need to treat this endeavor as such. We need to listen to the conversation that is already in progress and work towards fulfilling the goals of the conversation. Only after completing this step can we fully be true partners in the feminist movement.